|
[30 Oct 2007|04:58pm] |
|
I UPDATED BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
|
| question??????? |
[01 Dec 2005|04:32pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
I should of cheated- Keisha Cole |
] |
(((((((( ~*ONE WISH*~))))))))
iF i hAD oNe wISh...
yOu WoULd bE mY bOo...
pROmISe tO lOVe yOU...
truSt mE.....
i'Ll tRUSt yOu...
*Daily Question:
If you had ONE wish, what would it be and why?
|
|
|
[17 Nov 2005|04:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed/hurt/lonely |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
paper jezus- Staind |
] |
Well Steven hates me........
I HOPE I FUCKING DIE.....
REAL FUCKIN SOON
11/17/2005
i love you
|
|
| <3 |
[08 Nov 2005|05:21pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 ass. |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
tear that pussy up- jeezy f/ lloyd |
] |
okay....
so like I havent updated in like forty trabillion yearz. so congrats on me. anywho, what have yall peeps been up to? ive been straight chyllan. i dont really have much to talk about these dayz. me and steven are finally gettin along these dayz. ((( yesssssssssss.....))) i love him so much. oh hes sexy. anyways I was like in the worst mood today, i woke up like really bitchy. but i got over it. i think its stress or somethin. i dont know. so i havent smoked weed in like almost 2 weeks. im so quiting drugs this time. they've done ruined me. COMPLETELY. yeah... so mom found out about me having sex and doing drugs. : ( i know im a loser. but its all good. she didnt flip like i thought she was going to do. So i thank god 5754368668633614........... for that. we won the football game last night. so..... good job boys. im hungry. i miss steven. well i got to go to tha tobacco store with my uncle duck. ttyl
i love you steven.
Jessica
|
|
|
[23 Oct 2005|02:09pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 bored |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Lamb of God- Now you've got something to die for |
] |
well so Potter called me up and asked me to go to his house for a while with him, and i said yeah. so me and sarah went up there at 8:30 and stayed until 12:30 and the whole time potter aint say shit to me. that pissed me off so much. but usually when i go up to his house he usually sticks around with me the whole time. there was alot of bitches there i didnt like.
|
|
|
[07 Oct 2005|08:28pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 high/happy/depressed/stressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Happy- Mudvayne |
] |
I had to come home from wilsons and get some munch food. so me and kaitie got drunk as hell lastnight. it was the best. she threw up like 2060464643 timez. but its all gravy. im so fuckin fucked up right now. me, jake, elly, wilson, craig and cole smoked some blunts. 'tis was the best so far. bout to go smoke some more. i got to talk to my baby just now. i love him so much. i miss him. Wish he was still mine. so so so so sexxxy. well im just like obsessed with him. well i got to go to wendys so ill update later.
peace.
I love you!
|
|
|
[02 Oct 2005|02:01pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 stressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
kINg oF aLl eXCuSEs- sTAiNd |
] |
(( iM nOT gOINg TO wAIt on YoU fOReVEr...))
((tHiS TImE...))
well havent updated in foreverness. so last night i went to alleghanys homecomeing. may i add that it was the most boring night of my whole entire life. I went and chilled with stevens mom after school friday. It was fun. I listened to bob seger like the whole day. then we went and bought candles and lipgloss and charlie some gloves for football. charlies like the cutest little boy. but im supposed to go chill with mary again tomorrow. should be interesting. i got so fucked up after homecoming yesterday at wilsons. me elly and sarah rolled in my house like at 3:00, and we was all fucked up. I got fucked up in my homecoming dress. it was great. and sarah smoked a blunt with us. well i got to go get some tree.
peace.
I LOVE YOU SED
|
|
| yeah... |
[24 Sep 2005|02:24am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed<l3 |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Lamb of God- Now you've got something to die for |
] |
I just woke up and I cant really remember what I did last night. All I remember is Steven saying that Stape wants to fuck me. I was fucked up. Phil gave me this little white pill, and me and elly went in the bathroom stall at the game and snorted it. and it fucked us up in like 5 min. Then I went to Wilsons and smoked a Blunt, and I called Steven and thats all that I remember. I was supposed to go with Danny M. and Heavy-D. And Two was supposed to come get us but he never showed up so i left with sarah and danielle. I miss steven so much. Im supposed to go chill with his mom sometime, cuz we talked last night at the game. But I got to go get ready to go to the homecoming dance.
peace.
|
|
|
[23 Sep 2005|05:29pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
exhausted/ depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
staind- right here <3 |
] |
*`~((Does this make you happy now?...))~`*
well. My week has been okay. i guess. I seen steven with heather today. He looks happy when hes with her. thats good i guess. I dont like seeing him down and depressed all the time. i hope hes been doing good. i havent talked to him for like 2 weeks. i miss him so much. i cried like all day today. it hurts so bad when i see them two together. i know he loves her. elly told me that he said awhile back that he would do anything to get back with her because he loved her so much. I guess i wasnt the one like he said. i love him so much. but i guess thats good that (i guess) hes getting her back. as long as hes happy.I wish we were still together. well i got to go get ready to go to the game.
peace.
</3
|
|
| so...... yeah |
[20 Sep 2005|05:22pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed<l3 |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Gary Allen- The best I ever had |
] |
*((Memories of you,
haunting me...))*
well another homosexual day in the life of jessica. this sucks so bad, to always feel like this now. And knowing that it wont ever go away. ive done tried so hard to forget about him. its so fuckin hard. i miss him so much. everything i look at reminds me of him. and when i close my eyes all i see is him. why does the worst things always happen to me? well i got to go make me a shirt for friday.
peace.
|
|
|
[18 Sep 2005|11:41am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed/ hurt / pissed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Happy- Mudvayne |
] |
LOVE = BULLSHIT
omfg. I hate my life. Love is the worst thing that could ever possibly happen to people. That word is fake, scary, bull-shit, and hurting. Its the worst fucking thing that happend to me. Its not a regret, but I wish it wouldnt of happend to me. It was good while it lasted. But all i can do is put it all behind me and start a new chapter in my life.
peace.
|
|
| forgive and forget.... |
[17 Sep 2005|06:23pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed/bored/sad/horny |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
lamb of god- laid to rest |
] |
.: *~ Now you've got something to die for.... ~*:.
well... Im drowning in boredom.
bout to go ridin with farona.
alleghany won last night. : (
Oh well.. I feel real bad for covington though. and to think we almost won.
I miss steven.
ALOT!!!
Laura Agbo is a nasty slut.
I miss Steven. (x100)
Well I got to go party.
And get home like at 5 in tha mornin.
Peace.
*~I love you Steven Eric~*
|
|
| fuck... |
[12 Sep 2005|05:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
high/depressed : ( |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Snap-Slipknot |
] |
~.:~*I didnt mean it when I said
I didnt love you so...*~:.~
I miss steven so effin much. Yesterday he took me to valley ridge and we talked and hes doing stuff that scares me. Hes changed so much. I wish I had the old steven back. I worry about him ALOT. Too much. ughh... Im just lost without him. Im doing drugs heavy again. And i'm afraid its going to get like it used to when I lived in Clifton and before I ever met him. Im just hopin it wont. I feel real bad empty inside. But now Im in tears so ill change the subject. I confronted Laura today. for like the 4th time in 2 weeks. I was so fuckin close to beatn her ass. Then mrs. Warden had to jump in. Thats okay. I WILL get her out of school. She wouldnt even come out the damn school today. Shows how bad she wants to bank/ beat my ass. *(Jessica dies in laughter)* lol. ha ha ha ha ha :) . Well I got to go smoke a blunt with james and some other people and then make cupcakes for school tomorrow. + theyre ~/funfetti/~ *yay*! well ttyl.
peace.
I love you Steven.
|
|
|
[10 Sep 2005|02:58pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 pissed/ depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Brooke Valentine- Girl fight |
] |
Laura Agbo is a two-timing SLUT.
shes a hoe, skank, slut, whore
She thinks shes goin to bank me, but shes goin to need a army to get through my crew.
Oh well, maybe she can get her sasquatch friend tiffany baker on me.
oh well all my guy friends say that theyll beat her ass just for lookin like a damn guy.
pretty sad that she has to get all her other hoes after me.
well my mom done said that i can scrap.
so if anyone who reads this talks to her, tell her that i live at 422 south lexington avenue. my phone number is 962-8306.
talk to yall people later
peace.
I love you steven.
|
|
|
[06 Sep 2005|07:04pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
staind- right here <3 |
] |
well my day sucked again. as usual. I miss steven so much. I wish we were still together. He told me he loved me today at jrtc. That made me a little happy. 2005-09-01 01:35 baby everything will be the same again I promise. I dont want you to worry about that or me right now. I know Ive been an asshole to you for like the past week, and Ive done some fucked up shit. But theres just things going through my head that I need to straighten out on my own for awhile. You're not worthless. Im the one thats worthless for doing this shit to you. But I'm only going to get worse and I dont want to drag you down with me. I just need some time to sort my shit out, because you dont deserve to be treated the way that I have treated you. Yeah I know you've fucked up a few times, but I'm willing to forgive you if you can just give me some time to think shit through. I love you and I dont want to hurt you anymore than I already have... <<< I hope he dont break that promise. He's never broke a promise to me before. I miss him so fuckin much. I lay in bed at night crying for him and ask myself 'why' all the fuckin time. everytime i get somethin good goin in my life it all fucks up. I guess im not meant to have anything good in my life. i just called steven, hes at the volley ball game. that just makes things even worse. everywhere laura is, he is. maybe he chose her over me. i dont know. so.......... wtf. I wish i could just get over this. apparently he dont love and want to be with me like he said. and now that i think of it, he did break a promise, he said that he would never leave me for nothing and look what the fuck happend. oh well i still love him. im just goin to kill myself. life is just too difficult for me to handle. well i guess ill go sit and look at the letters he wrote me. and cry somemore.
peace.
~*.: I love you Steven Eric :.*~
|
|
| i miss him so much....... |
[02 Sep 2005|09:51am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
BYOB- System of a Down |
] |
I miss Steven so effin bad. ughhh. i wish things would go back to normal. im like totally lost without him. i just want to hold him in my arms. i love him so much. but i dont think he sees it. that little bitch done fucked everything up, just because shes in love with him. but thats okay. shell hear from me. so last night was interesting. me sarah and elly decided to roll up bush's party. so we get bobby mccoy to take us up to the 76 station. then we walked to the water tower. we got kinda lost. we finally found them. bush had to carry me through these big ass mud puddles. so katrina, bush, dabney, weeman, chris, chadwick, joey dudley & his brother, brandon, and tony was all up there. they were drinkin and smokin. but i didnt. they was all suprised and shit, because they didnt know that i didnt do that shit anymore. then we thought that the jakes was watchin us. so we all started runnin, elly tripped, i slipped, it was all just chaos. i missed steven really bad too. i called him and left him a voice mail. then we had to get home before eleven oclock. so me elly and sarah, walked from carpenter drive, all the was to the high school. im so tired right now. i want to see steven real bad. i'd do anything to see him now. i wish things will get back to normal with us. hopefully they will. he said that he promises things will be like they used to. and i know that he dont break promises so things probably will be back like they used to. well i got to go back to sleep.
peace.
***--~I love you Steven~--***
|
|
|
[01 Sep 2005|04:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
staind- right here <3 |
] |
'*~ .:I dont want to relive all the mistakes i've made:. ~*'
i dont even know what the hell to say. my life is worthless now. i hate it. i might be moving to north carolina. just called my aunt and she said it will be ok if i come down there. theres no need for me to be in covington. bitches like to run their mouth before they know what the hell theyre talking bout. and it fucked things up alot worse. but when i ask what the hells going on, they act like they dont know shit. all i can say is, watch who you make friends with and trust no one. thats my number one piece of advice. i dont know what the fuck to do with myself. i just want to go get trashed to 'try ' to get this shit off my mind. but i cant, cuz i told him that i wouldnt. and this time im stickn to what the hell i say. i love him so much. i miss him already. i just hope things will work out better. but i think that he wants to leave me for good. maybe catilin will treat him better than me. and wont hurt him. everytime i get somthin good goin for me someone always has to fuck me over. but thats okay. what goes around comes around. well i got to go think.
peace.
-missn you-
Sometimes at night,
when I lay down to sleep,
I embrace myself,
I start to think...
Then I imagine
that you lie beside me...
hugs and kisses
all over my body.
I wish you
could really be here,
just to whisper,
"I love you," in my ear.
I would turn around and say,
"I love you, too."
But will it ever be true?
So I turn around
and I wonder some more,
still wanting your embrace,
so I close my eyes and picture your face...
I fall asleep dreaming of you.
In my dream it seems so true.
It's as if I can really feel
your kisses against my lips...
Then my eyes pop open
and you're nowhere to be seen,
And I feel so lonely
once AGAIN!
I love you steven.
|
|
|
[30 Aug 2005|03:06pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Happy- Mudvayne |
] |
another day of steven not associating with me. i hate my fucked up life so much. i dont know what else to do. because everything i do to him isnt good enough. and now i think that he wants to leave me. so i sit here in tears, again. not knowing what to do or say to him.i dont know. everything is just shitty now. when we was going to 7th period, i asked him for a hug and he wouldnt even touch me. that shit hurts so bad, makes me feel so damn worthless, like im not good enough for him or somethin. but HOPEFULLY things will smooth out and he'll talk to me like he used to and actually make it look like he cares. well i got to go think.
peace.
|
|
| : ( im stupid. |
[29 Aug 2005|06:39pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
staind- right here <3 |
] |
im really depressed. i wish Steven would talk to me like he used to.things are changin. i wish that they wouldnt though.ive been crying for like the past 2 weeks non stop. i feel like a fuckin retard. i really fucked up. im just so fuckin stupid. i love him so much, i cant even put it into words. i hope that he'll forgive me for always fuckin up. i try really hard not to, but it always fuckin happens. but hes the 'only' boy that ive tried this hard to straightn up for. im really am trying. i am officially drug free. so no more drugs, cigs, beer. i actually want to quit. its not worth it. steven can be my anti drug:). i miss him so much. hes changed. i wish things were like they used to be, when we never argued and shit. i hope he dont leave me. ill kill myself. seriously. i couldnt picture myself without him now. i hate the way i treat him. hes real nice to me but i treat him like shit. and yes... i got me a reality check. i am really sorry for doing that shit to him. but he wont accept my apologies. but i love him so much. im gettn my act together. im just sick of being the bad guy in all of this. i wish that he would just forgive me for everything and me and him just start out new. this time im not going to fuck ANYTHING at all, up. i hope he'll give me one more chance. because i will make sure that nothin goes wrong. i dont even think that he likes me anymore. because he wont even hug/kiss me anymore. and when i say that" i love you" he'll get quiet and say "i'll talk to you later" and when he calls it like he dont even want to talk to me. we used to talk on the phone for like a long time and now its like 5 min. we dont even spend time together anymore. my day consists of school, home, homework, shower, and bed. " NO STEVEN " well i got to go do some homework. and i guess hate myself some more. more than everybody already does.
peace.
|
|
|
[28 Aug 2005|11:44am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sad |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
staind- right here <3 |
] |
[1.] How did you meet?: i dont really know
[2.] When did you meet?: last school year
[3.] Does he/she smoke?: no
[4.] Is he/she an alchoholic?: no
[5.] Do they use drugs?: no
[6.] What is the sexiest thing about he/she?: just everything he does
[7.] Have you met his/her parents?: yes
[8.] How many dates have you gone on? I dont think we have
[9.] Does he/she like you?: I hope.
[10.] Is he/she a player?: no
[11.] What's his/her worst quality?: socom.lol
[12.] How much do you talk to eachother? not that much anymore
[13.] Does he/she know you love them?: I hope he knows
[14.] If you could go away anywhere with this person, where would it be?: far far away so we can be together alone
[15.] What song reminds you of this person?: 'Right here'- Staind
[16.] Does he/she attend school or have a job?: school
[17.] How easily did you fall for this person?: very, very easily. best thing that has ever happend to me
[18.] Does he/she have weird habits?: no
[19.] Is he/she taller or shorter than you?: taller
[20.] How far do you see yourself with this person? hopefully married and together forever. <3
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
bulu_wuna_b's journal